Eternal Gratitiude

 Hello everyone or anyone! 

This one is going to be short but its not the amount of words, its what you do with them...

 and things that are necessary to say, should be. so here it goes...

If you were here for my posts a few years ago, know that the situations have changed but the meaning/purpose has not..

allow me to elaborate...

I spent 18 years of my life with the one who I thought was "the one" we never got married but we do share a child. I have nothing bad to say about this amazing man because despite everything he has gone through, and that we have gone through, his true purpose in life is to be a wonderful father. And I cant say that he has not  done everything in his power to be that person.  We have had some ridiculously difficult times and have not always seen eye to eye but the core of his heart has always been his kids. 

I recently lost my job, the week before my sons birthday and that was heart wrenching. The worst thing for a parent is to not be able to provide every piece of happiness you want them to have in their lives. So when I couldn't, it broke my heart.

But this feeling was short lived. 

I wasn't going to have kids. 

But I met someone that changed my mind for a millisecond. That millisecond led to the absolute most beautiful part of my life. And as you all know, there is nothing that I "preach" more than gratitude. 

I am so grateful for everything he made happen this month. For never making me feel like I failed even though I sometimes did feel that way. His inclusion of my presence, when he did not need to spoke volumes. He showed our almost adult son the man he truly is and in turn, opened up a greater understanding of who he truly is to our son-the guy I met many moons ago.

So today's blog is about nothing more than gratitude. I am grateful for the gift this man has given me. I am grateful for everything we taught each other. Grateful for the love we shared during our time together. Grateful for the way we can  currently act like adults (for once) and try to change the way our son sees us as parents, as ridiculous as we were, and as much as we sometimes hurt each other. he needs to understand that things weren't always as crappy as our actions made them seem.

But I couldn't be more proud to have chosen this man to be the father of my child. I never even considered it before I met him. 

And he has come so far, and has such a good life to life ahead of him. And even though we parent separately now, does not take away from the fact that he is the reason for the greatest joy that exists in my life...

So I thank him from the bottom of my heart.